How To Keep Going When You Don't See Results | EP 020
In this episode, Phil talks about the importance of perseverance and self-belief in achieving personal and professional goals. He shares his experiences of overcoming challenges and highlights the need for resilience in the face of adversity. Emphasizing the importance of small, consistent steps and a positive mindset, Phil provides insights on how to transform our lives and realize our dreams through dedication and hard work. This episode is a powerful reminder to embrace failures as part of our journey towards success.
Welcome to The Phil Bohol Show, hosted by USMC veteran, mindset coach, sales expert, self-made entrepreneur, husband, and father, Phil Bohol. On this podcast, we don't just offer strategies — we offer a war cry, a call to arms, a challenge to rise, to break free from the shackles of mediocrity. You’ll learn the raw truth on how to break your limitations, scale your business to 7-figures, and level up every area of your life. Together, we won't just face challenges. We will crush them. Relentlessly.
Timestamps:
(01:31) - Always Embracing Perseverance
(05:38) - Reinventing Yourself
(09:44) - The Importance of Defining Your Dreams in Detail
(11:52) - Reverse Engineering Success
(12:58) - Embracing Messy Action
(14:29) - Enjoying the Process Leads to Faster Success
(18:37) - Focusing On The Immediate Next Step
(21:39) - The Power of Doing Your Best Daily
(22:44) - The Continuous Journey of Self-Improvement
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Transcription:
[00:00:00] You're going to get kicked in the face.
It's going to try and test you on a daily basis.
There's going to be some days where you're like, “No, I'm gonna crush this. I'm ready to fail. I'm in it to win it.”
And the very next f*cking hour, you're like, “Jesus Christ. Ah, was this the right decision? Should I keep doing this? Damn it.”
And then again, you wake up the next day.
You're like, “I'm going to crush this.”
Get kicked in the teeth again.
[00:00:30] And you're just like, “Jesus, man, I don't even - ah, it's only been two days. And every day it's like that cycle.”
And for some reason, you just focus on, “OK, I'm going to get hit in the face again. I'm going to get hit in the face again.”
And then one day you look up and you're just like, “Oh, sh*t. My whole life has changed. I'm still getting kicked in the teeth, but like, my whole life has changed. I don't even know how I'm doing it, but I'm just doing my best every day.”
[00:01:00] When you can just do your best every day, you win.
What's going on you guys?
It's Phil Bohol and welcome to the Phil Bohol Show, where we have real talk about family, fitness, finance, and everything that would hold you back from leveling up in every area of your life.
And more importantly, how I personally got through them.
Everybody else in this world wants to bullsh*t you.
I'm here to give you the truth.
[00:01:30] Guys, today we're going to talk about how to keep going when you don't see results.
I think this is everybody's f*cking problem.
Look, you're going to go through a lot in your life.
You're going to go through so many trials in your life.
Doesn't matter what season you're in, doesn't matter if it's, if it's personal related, if it's relationship related, if it's career or business related, doesn't matter.
[00:02:00] You're going to go through so much sh*t in your life to get to where you're wanting to go.
And the biggest thing that you have to remember that that causes anybody to be unsuccessful or successful is their ability to continue to persevere even if they don't see those results.
You're gonna get broken off, or life, God, the universe will try every single thing to see how long can you stay in the fight for.
And you gotta remember that most people don't stay in the fight for that long.
[00:02:30] Most people in this world, they talk and they talk and they talk, and they say, they say, they say.
They say they're gonna do these things that are amazing in life.
And they don't follow through because in the mind, the mind says that we want these big bad goals.
We want to have the lifestyle.
We want to have the money.
We want to have the house.
We want to have the cars.
We want to have the family.
We want to have all of that stuff in our mind.
It feels so good to like, to think about that, to dream about it, to, to see ourselves in those situations in those environments.
[00:03:00] We're just like, damn, that's going to be so amazing.
Once I'm there, it's going to feel so amazing.
Once I've achieved all of those things.
And then they like try for like a second, and then like it hurts, it sucks, it hurts.
The things that you have to do in a relationship, you want to have the perfect relationship, you want to get married one day, you want to have kids, and then you still have ego, you still have pride, you still like talk down to people, you still treat people like sh*t, you still take things personal.
[00:03:30] How the f*ck are you going to attract the perfect partner for yourself if you still act that way?
Or maybe you're not good with your money, or maybe you're not responsible.
Maybe you're just drinking all the time.
Maybe you're always high.
Maybe you're not doing anything to attract somebody who actually wants to get married to that.
Like, if you're not somebody that somebody good wants to get married to, is that their fault?
Is that the world's fault?
Or is that your fault for not becoming who you need to be?
[00:04:00] You can want the marriage, you can want the relationships, you can want the best person you could possibly f*cking attract.
But are you that person that they would be attracted to?
See, the thing about relationships is, you don't seek a relationship.
You become the best version of you.
And that best version of you attracts the people that would be attracted to that version of you.
[00:04:30] But what it takes for you to go from the sh*t bag to the perfect version of you for now, that's good enough to find that relationship.
It's going to take a lot of work in the middle.
A lot of personal, you're going to have to drop the drinking, you're going to have to drop the smoking.
You're going to have to get into the gym.
You're going to have to like take your career or your business seriously.
So that way you're not struggling just to get by.
And then once you have a little bit of stability, that perfect partner will like notice you.
Or maybe because you're going to be in different scenarios, instead of being at the bar or going out to drinks with friends, you're at the gym, maybe you bump into her there.
[00:05:00] Or maybe, like, you go to a networking event, because, like, you're taking your business and your career seriously.
Instead of getting high, you're at a networking event, and maybe you bump into her over there.
But do you see how the different actions that you take result in different things?
But if you're always doing the same bullsh*t, that's gotten you to where you're at right now in life, you're never going to have different variables.
You're never going to have different outputs because the input will be the same.
[00:05:30] When we think about your business, when we think about life, when we think about leveling up in every single area, the work in the middle of where you're at to where you want to get to, the work in the middle is where everybody breaks off.
You have to remember that you're going to get here when you get here.
There's really no way to accelerate this part of your personal development.
Now, how fast somebody can personally develop, that's the only thing that that changes, right?
So instead of taking 10 years, maybe it takes five, maybe it takes one, maybe it takes a week.
It's probably not going to take a week.
Let's just, let's just be real.
[00:06:00] Your ability to completely change and reinvent yourself.
At a rapid rate, will allow you to condense that time.
When you learn from mentors, when you learn from people that have already walked the path you want to walk, you condense that time.
But it's different for different people.
People, like me, can drop who the f*ck we've seen ourselves as.
Like, for our entire life, if I've seen myself one way, I can completely drop that version of me today.
And then I can start becoming the newest version of me.
Most people can't do that because what happens?
[00:06:30] Most people are like, “Oh, well, sh*t. If I start changing how I've been this entire time, like what happens if my family starts judging me and they start hating on me, because they've known me to be like this drinker, this smoker, this like loser in life? And then I just flip a switch and decide like, I'm this happy, successful person that's driven and motivated to crush life. Like, what if they don't believe in me? Like, what if my coworkers don't believe in me? What if like all these people that have always known me to be this way, don't believe in me?
[00:07:00] It's like, bro, duh.
Why would they believe in you?
Like, listen to what you're saying right now.
You don't even sound like you believe in you.
Why would anybody else believe in you?
You have to believe in yourself for far longer than anybody.
We'll ever start like you have to do that for years.
[00:07:30] You have to believe in yourself for years while everybody's hating on you, while everybody's doubting you, while nobody is like cheering you on, even though you think they are.
They're just like, “Ah, no, no, no, f*cking you got it.”
But then in the back of their mind, they're like, “No, you don't. You've been drinking this whole time. You've been smoking this whole time. You've been doing stupid sh*t this whole time. You're not doing it.”
That's what's happening in their mind.
And if you absorb that, and you choose to believe all of these other people versus believing in yourself, of course nobody's gonna believe in you.
You have to believe in you far longer than anybody else will start to, and you just gotta accept that for what it is.
And that's where most people just stop.
[00:08:00] Like, you're so worried about what mom and dad think, what brother and sister think, what cousin, auntie, uncle, uh, friend, best friend, acquaintance, co worker, people, strangers, random people on the internet.
You're so concerned about them that it's like, but why can't you just do it for you?
Why can't you just drop this identity that no longer serves you for you and just be like, “No, I'm this person now.”
I'm not saying, like, be somebody that you're not.
[00:08:30] What I am saying is if you're like, “Hey, I'm gonna go get a haircut so that way I look more sharp. If I'm gonna dress up a little bit, maybe just wear a regular t shirt versus pajamas every single day.”
I don't know.
“Maybe I'm gonna clean up my face a little bit so that way, you know, it doesn't look like my f*cking facial hair is all over the place. Maybe I'm gonna take a bath every day versus -”
I don't know.
(People, please. I hope you don't do th*s sh*t every couple days, you know, like just little things.)
[00:09:00] “Oh, I'm gonna actually clean my car, so that way it doesn't smell like Carl's Jr. in there all the damn time.”
“Maybe I'm gonna clean the outside of my car so it doesn't look like I haven't washed it in years and I'm actually gonna take care of my sh*t.”
“Maybe I'm gonna clean my office so that way it's actually fun to work in my office.”
If you don't have an office, maybe you're going to clean your house because you actually like hold yourself to a standard, level up, do those things, believe in yourself.
Doesn't matter.
Like people are so worried about the results that they're not putting in the work in themselves and in a daily basis to earn that result one day.
[00:09:30] People are like, “Oh, I don't have it yet. I don't have it yet. I don't have it yet. I don't have it.”
But it's like, you never will.
You never will if you don't start the work here.
Right now.
Today.
Right after this.
Okay?
After you listen to this, right after this, get to work.
Because how do you keep going?
You have to like, really think about why you're doing this.
Why are you in this game of life?
[00:10:00] Because what you can do, and I tell this to my clients all the time, what you can do is go look into the corner.
There's a door.
That door leads to mediocrity.
The door is always available for you.
There's no lock.
Nobody's going to lock you out of that.
You can literally walk through that right now.
You can choose to, but the point is you haven't, you haven't just walked through that door, which means that there's a part of you that believes that you can break through, but you have to break through.
You can't like bounce off the wall.
You actually have to push and break through.
[00:10:30] So the biggest thing that you have to remember is like you can set a target, you can set your GPS of like, “Okay, in my life, I want to have our dream home. And this is what it looks like, this is the state that I want to live in, this is the country I want to live in, this is like how many bedrooms it's gonna have, how many bathrooms, because we're gonna have this many kids.”
Like, get so clear on where you're setting the destination.
And then the next thing is like, “Okay, well this is the car that I want, I just want a nice family BMW. Maybe I want a - I don't know - a Tesla.”
Maybe you want the Lambo.
[00:11:00] I don't know whatever it is for you.
You what color is it?
What year is it?
What do the rims look like?
What does the interior look like?
How does it smell in there?
Like all of it get clear set the GPS.
Okay, this is this is where I want my business to be.
This is where I want my career to be.
If you're not like a business owner person, you know, this is this is where I want my income to be.
Get so clear.
And then don't just like write like a million dollars like, “Oh, I want to make a million dollars.”
But why?
[00:11:30] Because what you might find is like a million dollars is actually far more than the life that you want or that you're budgeting for here.
I could get so clear and understand, like, why did you choose that?
Maybe it's 2 million, maybe it's five, maybe it's 10, maybe it's infinity.
(But you can't set a GPS to infinity, so just start with a number, okay?)
Now that you're clear about that, you set the GPS.
And what you do is you start reverse engineering how you're going to get there.
[00:12:00] Hey, because every step that you take illuminates the path you won't know because you won't know what your holdups are going to be.
You won't know that.
Okay, cool.
“I'm gonna start this new business. And when I do that, I'm gonna crush it.”
Right?
“I'm gonna build a seven figure business.”
But maybe In order to build that seven figure business, because you can only see the next couple steps in front of you.
[00:12:30] Then you're just like, “Oh sh*t, I have to actually dial other businesses to try to get business? Oh sh*t. I don't know how to dial people. I don't know sales. I don't have the confidence to talk to people like that.”
Then what do you have to do?
You have to work on your confidence.
You have to work on your sales.
You have to work on your marketing.
You have to work on what you do after they pick up.
You have to like to build it all out.
And then you have to like, you have to be like, “Oh sh*t, like, this is actually going to be some work. It's not just a matter of like this vision of a business. I actually have to like to do work.”
And again, people are going to break off because then you'll be like, “Well, that's a lot of work.”
[00:13:00] But the thing is, if you're willing to be like, “All right, cool. So I guess first thing that I can do is if I just want to take messy action, I guess I can go on Google because I can find the phone numbers for all of these local businesses or whatever that I can potentially serve. And obviously they're going to have a phone number there. I'll make a spreadsheet of all of those different companies with all of their different phone numbers, with all their social medias, with all of their emails, and I'm going to start outbounding. I don't know what the f*ck I'm going to say, but I'm just going to start.And then with every rejection that I face, I get to dial in my process a little bit more.”
I get to see like, “Ah, that sucked.”
And then maybe somebody like ripped me a new asshole.
And I'm just like, “Oh man, that was terrible. They ruined my whole day.”
I let it ruin my whole day.
Then I know I have some personal development rejection stuff I got to work through.
You see what I'm saying?
And so by doing that, now we attack the weak points.
We work on our personal development.
We get more confident.
We start becoming more resilient to rejection.
[00:14:00] We start learning the sales process that we need to take.
And then boom, then we actually initiate a conversation where we feel more confident.
We take them through a process.
We qualify them.
We figure out what we need to do to take this into a deeper conversation, to see how we can help their business.
Boom.
Next thing.
And then eventually that leads to a client.
And once you get that first client, then it's like, “Oh my gosh, all I had to do is put my head down, do the work.”
And that's the thing.
It's so simple.
But it's not easy, because of all of the different things.
[00:14:30] And as you enter this journey of like trying to change your life, different things will become road bumps, speed bumps, a brick wall, a f*cking mountain that you have to climb.
Like there's going to be something in front of you that you're going to have to overcome.
And that's why it feels like sometimes like, “Damn, like I just want to get the result.”
But the result is on the other side of the work.
The result is on the other side of you becoming the version of you you're not yet.
[00:15:00] And it's being able to be very intentional and knowing it's going to take work for you to become that person, to master that thing.
And when you can just bite the bullet and just be like, “I'm going to have to sacrifice my comfort. I'm going to have to sacrifice whatever the hell I think I know. I'm going to have to look dumb. I'm going to have to fail for - I'm just going to have to do whatever I need to do to win.”
And when you become relentless, for some reason, the unlock happens.
For some reason, like you finally break through and you start seeing some results.
[00:15:30] It's not all of the results.
It's just some results.
And you're just like, “Okay, something - I don't know what's happening - something's happening.”
And what's happening in that moment is you're starting to have fun with the work.
This is how you move through those times where you learn how to detach from that end result that you want so bad.
Like all you do is hold onto it, right?
It's like a GPS, okay?
It's like you're driving in your car and you're looking at the GPS and all you're looking at is the end address.
[00:16:00] Imagine if you're just looking at the GPS and you're like, “I just can't wait to arrive.”
And then you miss every single turn that will help you get to that end address.
Will you ever get there?
Does that make sense?
Or are you like, “Okay, in 800 feet, I'm going to turn left. Okay. In 300 feet, I'm going to turn right. Okay. In like four miles, I'm going to go straight. Okay. I'm going to look out for that.”
And then once you eventually get to the end destination.
That's what people got to understand.
Yes.
[00:16:30] Can't be too worried about the end goal.
It doesn't matter about the results that you get throughout that.
It's about the incremental gains.
It's getting closer and closer to the result because the thing is if you're too attached to that end result, if you're too attached to what you want, you're going to be distracted from the work that's required.
[00:17:00] And if you don't learn to have fun with the work, if you don't learn to have fun with the failures, with the rejection, with getting kicked in the f*cking teeth that it's going to take for you to create the life that you want, that you can be proud of, the door to mediocrity is right there.
You can just settle for a boring, mediocre life.
You can settle for the relationship that doesn't even make you happy.
You can settle for a job that you get paid for, have security for, you don't really make a lot.
You work with people that hate their lives and you're just surrounded by them all the time.
You settle for a little sh*tty apartment because you can't afford the house that you want.
[00:17:30] Or you settle for a house that just makes you miserable, that doesn't even inspire you or motivate you.
The door is right there.
Guys, to have the life that you want.
You have to know that it's going to take work.
You have to be able to like stop for a second and just like really ask yourself like, “Damn, am I giving myself the proper expectations for this?”
[00:18:00] If I really do want that life, if I really want to be that person that says like, “Oh my gosh, I worked my ass off for this. I earned this sh*t.”
Like what price did that person have to pay to be able to say that?
Are you willing to be that person?
Because if you are, then it doesn't matter about getting that end result right now.
If you achieve that in your life, it's your life's work.
[00:18:30] When you think about it being your life's work and just getting there, and then realizing that all you have to do is be more present and start enjoying the process of living this life versus worrying so much about that end result, you'll actually get there faster.
Okay, I'm gonna put one more visual in your mind.
We have two drivers, okay?
Driver number one, all he does.
He stares at that GPS, but he's zoomed in at the end result.
[00:19:00] Driver number two, okay, he's not zoomed in at the end result, he's already plugged in the GPS, he's looking at the turns.
In one day, let's say this is California to New York.
In one day, they're both driving, one is looking at the end result, one is looking at the turns, only the very next turn that they can possibly take.
In one day, who's going to be closer to that end destination?
The person that's getting lost because they're not paying attention to the signs?
[00:19:30] Or the person that's just like, ‘Okay, left turn, right turn, straight, go onto this freeway, exit, do this other thing.’
Who's actually getting closer to the end destination?
This person.
Are they focused on the same end result?
Yes.
Are they focused on the right things?
No.
Yes.
End result turns.
[00:20:00] The only way for you to get closer to that end result that you want is by not focusing on it.
Get clear, understand the target, understand what you're aiming for, but don't waste your days.
Focus on something you can't control.
Focus on right now.
Focus on today.
Focus on what you can control and understand that if you're comfortable, then you're not doing what you need to do because It's a very scary thing to start going in a different direction and creating the life that you want, that you can be proud of.
It's a scary thing.
[00:20:30] And, and the thing is like in life, like people are so like, “Oh, it's so amazing. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.”
“It's f*cking motivational.”
“It's so easy. Just do the work.”
Blah, blah, blah.
But like, no, no, no, it's, it's hard.
You're going to get kicked in the face.
It's going to try and test you on a daily basis.
There's going to be some days where you're like, “No, I'm gonna crush this. I'm ready to fail. I'm in it to win it.”
[00:21:00] And the very next f*cking hour, you're like, “Jesus Christ. Ah, was this the right decision? Should I keep doing this? Damn it.”
And then again, you wake up the next day and you're like, “I'm gonna crush this.”
Get kicked in the teeth again.
And you're just like, “Jesus, man, I don't even - ah, it's only been two days. And every day it's like that cycle.”
And for some reason you just focus on the, “Okay, I'm gonna get hit in the face again. I'm gonna get hit in the face again.”
[00:21:30] And then one day you look up and you're just like, “Oh sh*t, my whole life has changed. I'm still getting kicked in the teeth, but like my whole life has changed. I don't even know how I'm doing it, but I'm just doing my best, every day.”
When you can just do your best every day, you win.
When you can just be very intentional with just doing your best, it's very hard to receive this when you don't have faith in yourself, or you don't have faith in the path.
But when you just believe in yourself, there's a beautiful thing that happens.
[00:22:00] Where it's like you kind of just like let go and let God.
And you're just like, “Well sh*t, I pray, I meditate, I do whatever I gotta do, something's telling me and leading me on this path, I'm just gonna get after it, I'm just gonna follow the breadcrumbs, I'm not gonna focus on the end result, cause that's never served me, I'm just gonna focus on the next step, the next step, the next step, and I'm just gonna follow these breadcrumbs, and I'm gonna trust that every single day, as long as I follow my battle plan, that I'm gonna be good to go. Because my track record states that I've gotten myself to this point in life. I can get myself to the next point and the next destination after that. And I just keep pushing. I don't know how I'm going to do it, but I'm going to do it.”
[00:22:30] And I want you to understand that the most successful people in the world, understand that when we set targets most of the time, if not all of the time, we don't know how the f*ck we're getting there.
But we do understand and have confidence that we will.
[00:23:00] It doesn't matter how long it takes.
Once we've decided that we're going to get there, we're going to get there.
And we can work with people to help us get there a little bit faster by bridging some of the gaps in our operating system, or we can choose to be a lone wolf and do it on our own and just take the next decade, two or three.
But as long as we choose to get there, we will get there.
Just make sure that - and I'll leave you with this.
Just make sure that as you enter this journey of changing your life.
[00:23:30] And you learn how to detach yourself from the end result and learn delayed gratification.
That you supplement how you experience this journey by not doing sh*t that doesn't serve you.
Getting drunk all the time, smoking weed all the time.
Just not working out, getting fat, getting a dad bod like I did, don't do that sh*t.
Cause then it makes you sluggish.
The weed makes you anxious.
The drinking makes you just like a terrible human.
[00:24:00] And if you do that, what happens is it elongates the time that it takes for you to make these big realizations.
But when you're like clear in the mind, and you know that you don't have these vices that are taking from you, you can actually have so much more clarity faster.
So that way you can make the turns because again, disoriented, you're not making those turns.
You're seeing the signs late.
And when you do that opportunity passes by.
So you want to make sure you're clear of all of those things, okay?
[00:24:30] Stay active.
Be straight edge.
Do what you gotta do.
You don't need to drink.
You don't need to smoke.
You don't need to do none of that.
You don't need the Carl's Jr. Double Western Bacon Cheeseburger.
You don't need any of that stuff.
Eat right.
Track your macros.
Be who you need to be to win at this game.
And when you do that, you will start feeling connected to life at a deeper level.
Meditate.
Pray.
Do whatever you gotta do.
Whatever you believe in.
Learn how to be more present in your life.
And this is how you keep going.
[00:25:00] This is the truth.
Whether you wanna hear it or not.
This is how you keep going.
There's no other secret sauce.
There's no other strategy, another map that I'm hiding from you.
The only way I've been able to get to this point in my life from where I was, and you can do your research and find out where I came from, is just not stopping.
It's just to take it a day at a time, take it a step at a time, and to just keep going.
[00:25:30] If you can just make that happen for yourself, and just keep going, especially on the days where you don't want to show up, wake up early on the days you don't want to wake up, don't hit that snooze button, go to the gym when you don't want to, especially when it's raining and cold.
Eat right, even though you just see the donuts your wife just bought again and you want to just get a burger and just eat your feelings away because of all the stress.
Don't do it.
Choose the path that will serve you.
[00:26:00] And every day you're gonna feel like you're stripping away this old self and that you're actually inviting in the new self, the higher self, the version of you that actually serves you.
Alright, just remember, you got this.
And if you ever need more support, you just watch and listen to all of my other content because there's a different things that maybe you're even unaware of that's preventing you from becoming who you need to be.
And the whole purpose of everything that I do here is to show you all of the things that I've had to change within myself to become who I am today.
[00:26:30] And I'm going to continue to document all the things that I changed throughout time.
So that way you can see how high somebody can go when they just don't break those promises to themselves.
That's the show.
Don't just listen to everything I just f*cking said and do nothing with it.
Take everything you learned, go out and execute.
Send it.
[00:27:00]