Life can be difficult to maneuver at times with its ups and downs, twists and turns. Learning how to be the calm in the center of the storm will help you to navigate these turbulent periods.
Stress can be defined as how we respond when our needs are not being met. And, if you're like me, you likely find yourself swept away by your emotions when there is an accumulation of stress. Hovering just below the surface of your stressors is where you will find your unmet needs - the place from which emotional distress arises. It's these unfulfilled fundamental needs that creates discomfort and allows emotional turbulence to take over.
In today's episode, Andrew shares a mindfulness meditation that has helped him work through his emotions and valuable resource to implement to calm down or settle into your emotions.
- Sit comfortably and close your eyes and begin to take slow deep breaths in and out of your nose. Feel yourself softening and settling into the place where you are sitting.
- Next, bring your awareness to whatever emotions you are feeling in this moment. Are you angry, sad, fearful, hurt, confused, or ashamed? Become aware of what comes up.
- See if you can watch your primary emotional state as if you are an observer, doing your best to not identify with the emotion. Stay right there with it even if it is unpleasant. Don't repress it or try to move away from it. Allow yourself to accept this aspect of yourself without any judgement as you simply observe the emotion.
- Now, notice where in your body you are feeling your anger, sadness, fear, or whatever emotion you're experiencing. Are there any images? Dig into your emotions and really see how it is they affect you.
- Remind yourself that you are not your emotions; that they are simply energy in motion. They are transitory.
- When you feel some calming as you settle into your emotions, shift your awareness back to your breathing.
- Breathe normally in and out through your nose and use your breath to relax any part of your body that feels tension or pockets of resistance.
- As you inhale, silently say "just." As you exhale, silently say "one." Again, inhale and silently say "just," then exhale and silently say "two." Do this until you've completed 10 breaths.
- Do another round, this time as you inhale, silently say "this." As you exhale, silently say "one." Again, inhale and silently say "this," then exhale and silently say "two." Do this until you've completed 10 breaths.
- Next, do another round. On the inhale, silently say "just." On the exhale, silently say "this." Do this until you've completed 10 breaths, or for as long as you like.
- Notice if you find yourself being distracted by any thoughts, sensations, or emotions in your meditation. Label the thought or the emotion and then simply return to focusing on your breath.
Notice how using the mantra "Just This" to anchor you back in the present moment enables you to return to a calm, centered place in your mind where you can once again ground yourself in the here and now. With practice, you learn to calm your emotions and focus your mind regardless of what is going on around you.