Holding Tension with Truth and Grace: Reconciling Affirming and Non-Affirming Beliefs in the Church

How can Christians maintain both conviction and compassion in conversations about LGBTQ identity, theology, and inclusion? Episode 41 of the LGBTQ Conversations series explores this critical tension through a raw, honest, and grace-filled response to a deeply personal email from a listener named “Jeremy.” Mike and Andy seek to create space for both affirming and non-affirming Christians to remain united in Jesus, emphasizing empathy, listening, and love over litmus tests of belief.

In this vulnerable and respectful exchange, Mike responds to Jeremy, a young gay Christian hurt by family rejection in the name of God, while raising essential questions about justice, empathy, and theological disagreement. This episode models how churches and individuals can engage complex conversations about sexuality, identity, and Biblical interpretation while refusing to dehumanize or divide.

Key Takeaways: • The Possibility of Shared Community – Can affirming and non-affirming Christians coexist within the same church body? Mike argues yes, if identity in Christ remains central and compassion is prioritized. • The Damage of Weaponized Theology – When non-affirming beliefs fuel condemnation, exclusion, or violence, they directly oppose Jesus's central message of radical love and mercy. • The Role of Empathy in Theological Disagreement – Jeremy’s powerful critique centers empathy as the litmus test for love; Mike agrees that deep listening and engagement with lived experience are crucial. • Non-Affirming without Harm – Holding a non-affirming theological stance doesn't require being unloving. Mike challenges the double standards often seen in the church between heterosexual and homosexual sin. • Identity in Christ as the Core – When sexual identity—gay or straight—becomes more central than Christ, it disorients discipleship. Communities must first see others as beloved image-bearers and siblings in Jesus.

Notable Quotes:

• “It's got to be possible for Jesus' followers to love, bless, and serve those they may disagree with theologically… without losing sight of their shared humanity and worth.”
• “The non-affirming view starts with the acknowledgment that we’re all broken—so no one should be excluded from grace, community, or the table.”
• “Empathy is the weapon your email represents… and it’s the very thing that blows up judgmental religion.”

Resources Mentioned: • Galatians 3:28 – "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female..." • Reference to Sodom and skewed interpretations of judgment • Stories of Jesus with the Samaritan woman (John 4) and the woman caught in adultery (John 8) • Ongoing LGBTQ Conversations series on Voxology

Join the conversation by wrestling alongside us. If you’ve ever struggled with the church’s stance on LGBTQ issues or desired a way forward that doesn’t sacrifice love for truth—or truth for love—this episode offers thoughtful, nuanced insight rooted in the way of Jesus.

We’d love to hear from you! Send your questions or stories to hello@voxpodcast.com, and connect with us online to grow the conversation.

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Music by Timothy John Stafford Twitter & Instagram: @GoneTimothy

Rate us, leave a review, and share this episode if it sparked something in you. Let's keep learning to love well—even when we disagree.



As always, we encourage and would love discussion as we pursue. Feel free to email in questions to hello@voxpodcast.com, and to engage the conversation on Facebook and Instagram.

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Music in this episode by Timothy John Stafford

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