In this episode of Relaxed Male, your host Bryan Goodwin dives deep into the intricacies of personal responsibility and self-awareness in relationships. Bryan discusses how men often become their own worst enemies by repeating the same actions and expecting different results. He emphasizes the importance of taking control of one's thoughts and actions to improve personal circumstances and relationships.

Bryan shares his personal journey of overcoming frustration and blame, highlighting how men tend to point fingers at others, especially their partners, for their problems. He explains how this mindset invites unnecessary suffering and prevents men from living life on their own terms.

The episode explores the concept of "the model," which suggests that our thoughts create our emotions, and how understanding this can lead to better relationship dynamics. Bryan encourages listeners to examine what they make circumstances mean about themselves and to challenge the thoughts that lead to negative emotions.

Bryan also discusses the "97% rule," advising men to hold back from saying most of the impulsive things that come to mind, and instead focus on building connection and intimacy with their partners. He stresses the importance of understanding and communication in relationships, urging men to listen to their partners and create circumstances that foster love and intimacy.

Throughout the episode, Bryan offers insights into how men can stop punishing themselves and their partners by giving up their "manuals"—the set of expectations they have for others—and instead focus on what they can control: their own thoughts and actions. He invites listeners to explore coaching as a tool for personal growth and better relationships.


In this episode of The Relaxed Male, host Brian Goodwin delves into the common pitfalls men face in relationships, particularly the tendency to blame others for personal problems. Brian shares insights on how men can take control of their relationship issues by understanding that the root of many problems lies within their own thoughts and actions. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and intentional living, urging listeners to examine the meaning they attach to circumstances and how these interpretations affect their emotions and relationships.

Brian discusses the "model" concept, which explains how circumstances trigger thoughts, leading to emotions and actions. He highlights the significance of recognizing and changing negative thought patterns to improve personal and relational well-being. Through personal anecdotes and relatable examples, Brian illustrates how misplaced blame and lack of communication can lead to unnecessary suffering and relationship breakdowns.

The episode also covers the "97% rule," encouraging men to refrain from saying most of the negative thoughts they might have, and the concept of "manuals," which are unspoken expectations we have for others. Brian advocates for letting go of these manuals to foster healthier relationships.

Listeners are invited to explore coaching as a means to gain clarity and improve their relationships, with Brian offering a free coaching session to help men step out of their comfort zones and embrace personal growth.