If there is no proof of my past ... Am I even real? John ponders the Memory Hole.

Am I even real? John talks with Gary about reflecting with other people, and ponders whether or not he’s been thrown in the Memory Hole; Not fitting in makes us feel lonely, even in crowds; Pretending to be normal and positive after years is tiresome; Should we pay drug addicts to switch to a more socially-acceptable addictions … like religion or money?