Continuing our Transformational Conversations series. Today we’re going to be talking about how to determine a fact from a fiction. The overview of the non-violent communication method is: I see, I think, I feel. The first step is to make an observation. Let’s say your friend is late and you find it disrespectful, as a result you feel hurt. We often hide a dig in the observation. "I see that you are selfishly late like always." Ask Is it true? If it’s an absolute truth, you can ask anybody in the world and it would still be true. Is it always selfish to be late? Perhaps not. And If they have ever been on time even once in their life, like always is still a statement of fiction. Selfishly like always is not a fact, it’s a dig. "I noticed that you came 30 minutes later than we agreed and I didn’t hear from you." That’s a fact. Do you want them to hear the rest? "I think that it’s disrespectful of my time to let me wait. I feel hurt and angry.” You honor the relationship by communicating with integrity, do your best to begin with a statement of fact, not a fiction.

 

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