Today’s guest is Ross Greene, an acclaimed author and parenting educator who works with kids with behavioral challenges. We are discussing how collaborative, proactive problem solving can reduce parenting challenges. Join us!

“Kids have information we badly need. If we don’t get that information we are at risk of plunging forward with uninformed solutions based on what we think is going on. Our theories and assumptions are often wrong. If you get what’s the matter wrong, your solution won’t work. The least fallible source of information is the kid.”

What you’ll hear in this episode:

• The role of problem solving in managing challenging behaviors 
• Why sticker charts and rationing of privileges doesn’t work for this demographic
• Making collaborative and proactive solutions work for your family
• Changing your mission: finding out what is getting in your kid’s way
• The benefit of a skills based approach – coaching skills improvement through problem solving
• The difference between control and influence
• Parenting and education as partnering and helping
• Collaborative vs unilateral problem solving
• Prioritizing unmet expectations to plan proactive problem solving
• Getting out of the heat of the moment in your parenting 
• Three steps to proactive problem solving
• The need for realistic, mutually satisfying solutions
• The danger of too many solutions
• Differentiating between a failure and a solution that wasn’t mutually beneficial, realistic or incomplete
• The messy but crucial nature of problem solving
• Perfection vs improvement over time – being realistic about goals
• Focusing on the right thing: learning to focus on the root cause of behavior vs the behavior itself. 

What does Joyful Courage mean to you? 

There is courage that comes along with being a parent, a teacher and a staff member and doing something different because what you are finding is that what you are doing now isn’t working. I’m delighted to say that there are many many parents, educators and facilities who have had that courage and they have been remarkably helpful to their children, their students and the children in their care and that should bring them a great deal of joy as well. It takes courage to take a look at what you are doing, think about it, and try to do something differently.

Resources:

The explosive child Lost at School Lost and Found Raising Human Beings The Drilling Cheat Sheet The B Team – Facebook Group Elevate Your Parenting – Facebook Group Lost & Found – Facebook Group for Educators Lives in the Balance – Facebook Group for Clinicians

 Where to find Dr. Greene:

Lives In the Balance Facebook Twitter Centre for Collaborative Problem Solving Dr. Ross Greene

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