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Eps 148: Solo Show - Teasing Apart the External Parenting Experience from the Internal Experience

Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens
Joyful Courage for Parenting Teens
Episode • Jun 12, 2018 • 35m

Solo Show – woop woop! It is all me today people, and I am so excited to be sharing some powerful thoughts and experiences with you today.

  • Wading through our experience to support out children
  • The writing process
  • Going deeper into what parents can uncover/discover for themselves
  • We have an external experience of raising kids – everything that happens outside of us
  • We also are having an internal experience – the ways that our physical body feels, sensations, also the emotional experience that we are having, what gets brought up by the external stimuli
  • External and internal are both happening at the same time
  • Based on what our experiences have been in life, our relationships in life, we have a lens that we see the world out of
  • Sometimes the internal response “works” for us
  • We have a well wired survival system – amygdala – but our survival system isn’t always what is needed in our daily life
  • The pendulum swing of raising/living with teens – everything is great until it is not, parents are the anchor that witness/hold space and it’s hard to remember that the behavior is a pendulum swing. Connect /loving vs dysregulation/discouragement
  • We (parents) go into “fix it” mode
  • Alternative – recognizing what is happening physically in my body, seeing what is happening for me, what is the lens I am looking out of?
  • Fear – tension in the body – belly/jaw
  • When kids feel discouraged, they tend to want to share the feeling with others
  • Looking below the surface - the iceberg metaphor
  • Episode 129
  • Episode 103
  • Episode 110
  • Today is a reminder that there is so much going on under the surface…. Curiosity as a guide AND it’s ok and important to recognize where you are at physically/emotionally and taking a pause to get yourself together

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