Continuing our Transformational Conversations series. Ask yourself what you really want? Sally was hurt when Diana did not ask her to be a bridesmaid. When they talked about it, It didn’t go well. I only knew because Diana called me telling me that she felt blindsided and attacked, which reinforced her decision to leave Sally out of the bridal party, Diana contemplated disinviting Sally altogether. But I could imagine Sally’s blunt approach was let’s share all the things bothering us about our friendship to “clear the air.” What's more effective is the vulnerable approach which requires emotional intelligence and taking action to support the outcome you really want. In this case, the friendship by taking Diana out for some quality time. Saying “Spending time with you today means so much to me. I want to confess that I felt a little insecure when you didn’t ask me to be a bridesmaid. I realized I only wanted that because I value our friendship. Please let me know what I can do to help you and support you for the wedding. I’m here for you.” Which approach would move you towards a stronger friendship?

 

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