Now I have talked about this a bit in Episode 82
The 3 A'sThere are 3 reasons for divorce and those are the 3 A's. These A's are trust destroyers. You can overcome these but it takes time and a lot of it. When I say, "time" I don't mean days or months I mean a minimum of 3 years but it can take as long as the offended party needs to trust in the offender again. Now those three A's are...
- Abuse
- Addiction
- Adultery
You may hear something like, we just fell out of love. Ok but that isn't a reason to get a divorce. That is a thought and we are talking about thoughts soon.
One side dropped the ballThis is where often the woman gets tired of her man not being the man she married. Yes, this I am pointing at us dudes. Why? because when we marry we are often in shape and driven for a purpose. We are excited and out to conquer the world.
Yet let a few years go by and we are sitting in front of the television watching sports and not going anywhere. We as men dropped the ball. Now the woman can do this too. However, this happens more to men than to women nowadays. Women initiate 70% of all divorces. They wouldn't do that as much if men were not dropping the ball.
So yeah We do have to take responsibility for women not being satisfied with what we are doing. We failed many of their tests.
When we give up and resign our lives to what it is. The women in our lives will not be happy. They want to go on an adventure with their man.
The Emotional Connection FadedThis is often a reason given when one side has given up. Now it is often stated because of the lack of being fed a love language. It could also be that one part of the marriage doesn't see an objective. They struggle with finding why. This is often tied to dropping the ball but it is also just as much that men not talking to their friends.
You can wear out an emotional connection Yeah it's possible. When you turn to your wife with every possible problem you have. You will tire her out. Women need positive energy in their life. They get that energy from their men. Men take negative energy and share it with their other masculine friends. This is why you need a good group of men who you see on a regular basis. So you spread the negative out and you draw in the positive for your wife. If you don't do that enough your wife will tire of your emotionally draining her and she will leave.
You have way too many weak pillars. Are you building your mind? What is your health like? How many friends do you have in your inner circle? What are you working towards? This is what women want to see in their men. Men who are driven to improve themselves. Men on a quest. This
Nice GuyWomen are smart and sadly the nice guy thinks the opposite. They believe they can manipulate the women in their life forever. Yet these women catch on fairly quickly and they start drawing away. They stop with the sex and start nagging. It becomes the problem that all nice guys complain about. The woman is distant and cold. Why? because the nice guy is a manipulative bastard and won't let his wife have her own emotions.
ThoughtsThis is the reason behind all divorces. Even when we are looking at the 3 A's. A person's thoughts are behind those words. Thoughts are what keep men from going for the gusto. It is Your thoughts are what keep you on your couch, watching a game that you have power over. The thoughts that tell you your wife is cold or even frigid come from your mind.
A person's thoughts are what create the emotions they feel. When they feel those emotions they make a judgment as to whether that emotion is good or bad. If the emotions are unpleasant they will try to do stuff that creates better feelings within their body. This could be an affair, use addiction, or may even turn to abuse.
Thoughts are the most powerful item in a person's world so you can actually change a divorce by changing YOUR thoughts. You don't even have to find out what your wife's thoughts are. You just have to make the change in yourself and your world will change.