Windshield wipers that go too fast or too slow, the creator of the Steam game "Rape Day" calls in, mass shootings and the mental illness of "what did you think was going to happen?", my Dr. Phil tapes are held for ransom, 50 retarded ways to leave your lover, a new news babe comes into the studio, getting pat on the stomach, and how to be creepy; all that and more this week on The Dick Show!