As a teenager, John felt uneasy about the new sensations of arousal in his changing body. He wasn’t sure how to handle them, which led to persistent discomfort, performance anxiety, and awkward early attempts at intimacy with girls.

During his university years, John moved past some of his self-doubt—but his behavior in relationships took a troubling turn. He describes feeling like he was “trying to make up for lost time,” and admits he didn’t treat his girlfriends with the respect they deserved. Even though it felt awful, he found himself cheating and sabotaging his relationships.

In this episode, Janna and John unpack those complicated feelings and explore what was really driving his actions.

Tune in next week for Part 2 of John’s story.

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