When a bad touch leads to discussion about the human condition, it can only mean one thing — soccer is back. Emodiaz pulled the soccer ball out of the Wizard Bird virtual ad realm to t-bag the Timbers and Kelvin Leerdam apparently made his MLS debut, but is the world destined to get better, or are we just as awful, but with access to the internet? Makes you think. See omnystudio.com/policies/listener for privacy information.

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