SEASON 4 EPISODE 9: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN

A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: Of course Trump’s not dead.

On the other hand, how could you really TELL?

But this much is clear: He’s never voluntarily STFU for five days before in his effing life.

And how could his own White House have possibly made it look MORE like he was dead! Or is desperately ill. Or had surgery. Or is having surgery. Or… what? They maximized the ways that conspiracy theories could build – including that 3-1/2 hour Cabinet Meeting/Comedy Roast/Dear Leader Circle Jerk last week. If that didn’t look like a farewell event I don’t know what could. I don't know what's really going on and YOU don't know what's really going on and America doesn't know what's really going on (except that the media has completely dropped the ball, not even covering the rumors let alone providing solid information). But there are lots of provable facts in the last five days of Trump MIA that might explain what's going on at a White House that couldn't manage radio silence.

PLUS: Trump's desire to boast about the Covid vaccine, the hallucinations of Kristi Noem and Bobby "What Kind of Mitochondria Are You Wearing" Kennedy, the solution to baseball's Tommy John Surgery crisis that isn't a crisis, and a farewell to the beloved Mrs. Weiner.

B-Block (32:50) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: As soon as the staff of Vanity Fair threatened to walk off if they put Melania Trump on the cover, she leaked a story to the NY Post that she didn't have time to be on their stupid cover anyway (she was on it in 2017). Candace Owens is back and now blaming the Minnesota school shooting on the government bid to take away your guns. So Trump is trying to take away your guns? And expanding kinda late into 9/11 trutherism, nitwit fascist Tucker Carlson gets the YEAR that 9/11 happened, wrong.

C-Block (43:20) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL/SPORTSBALL CENTER: So another all-star baseball pitcher, Randy Rodriguez, needs Tommy John Surgery. So baseball is back with preposterous solutions to the "crisis" of too many such surgeries. I'll offer two rules changes that would really do the job, but more importantly I would suggest that Tommy John Surgery is one of the most positive improvements in baseball in the last 60 years. The same percentage of pitchers get injured as they did in 1965, only in 1965 there was nothing to do when they tore up their elbow, shoulder, or anything else.

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