#86 | Why “Just Be Yourself” Isn’t Enough — What LGBTQ Teens Actually Need From Their Parents
Heather Hester welcomes listeners to Just Breathe Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen, creating a safe space for parents to understand and support their LGBTQ children. The podcast begins by emphasizing the importance of recognizing that parents are not alone in their journey, which can often be filled with fear, confusion, and uncertainty. Heather takes a moment to address recent communications from listeners, expressing her commitment to focus on the well-being of families. She acknowledges the current climate of fear and division in society, urging listeners to unite and take action against the forces that threaten the acceptance and safety of LGBTQ individuals. Heather provides resources and organizations that parents can engage with, fostering community and collective strength.
The discussion then transitions into a deep dive into Stage Two of the coming out process, which centers around identity comparison. Heather explains that during this stage, teens begin to grapple with their feelings and experiences, often feeling isolated and unsure of their place in the world. She shares insights into the emotional turmoil that comes with this stage, including self-doubt and the desire for acceptance. The importance of representation in media is highlighted, as Heather stresses that seeing characters who reflect their realities can provide comfort and validation to LGBTQ teens.
As the episode unfolds, Heather reassures parents that their children will seek explanations and understanding during this critical time. She encourages open dialogue, suggesting parents approach conversations with compassion and curiosity, allowing their children to express their feelings without judgment. The goal is to create an environment where kids feel safe to explore their identities, while parents learn to navigate their own responses. By the end of the episode, Heather emphasizes the need for patience and understanding, reminding parents that love and support are paramount as their children navigate the complexities of coming out.
Resources:
How the ACLU tracks anti-LGBTQ laws
The Campaign for Southern Equality
Project Caerus - Youth of Florida are organizing to help the LGBTQ Community
Hi, I’m Heather Hester, and I’m so glad you’re here!
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At the heart of my work is a deep commitment to compassion, authenticity, and transformative allyship, especially for those navigating the complexities of parenting LGBTQ+ kids. Through this podcast, speaking, my writing, and the spaces I create, I help people unlearn bias, embrace their full humanity, and foster courageous, compassionate connection.
If you’re in the thick of parenting, allyship, or pioneering a way to lead with love and kindness, I’m here with true, messy, and heart-warming stories, real tools, and grounding support to help you move from fear to fierce, informed action.
Whether you’re listening in, working with me directly, or quietly taking it all in—I see you. And I’m so glad you’re part of this journey.
Takeaways:
- The coming out process involves various stages, including identity confusion and comparison, which our kids navigate internally.
- It's crucial for parents to recognize the feelings of isolation their children may experience during this journey.
- Encouraging open communication and understanding creates a safe space for our LGBTQ children to explore their identities.
- Finding characters that reflect their experiences in media helps LGBTQ youth feel seen and supported.
- Parents should give themselves space to process and maintain open-ended curiosity about their child's feelings.
- Staying informed about local organizations and events can empower families to take action in support of LGBTQ rights.
More Human. More Kind. formerly Just Breathe: Parenting Your LGBTQ Teen explores connection, courage, and community for every concerned parent, mom, or ally navigating fear, grief, and bigotry with hope, resilience, and empathy. Through open-minded education, inclusive parenting guidance, and advocacy for mental health, safety, and a human first approach, we support LGBTQ youth and stand for human rights and social justice. More Human. More Kind. empowers listeners to shift their mindset, embrace activism and allyship, and lead with kindness, healing, and purpose.
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