Eldest daughter 'syndrome' and the trouble with parentification. 80
What do you think of this episode? Do you have any topics you'd like me to cover?
The hashtag #eldestdaughtersyndrome is reported to have had a whopping 24.7 million views on TikTok, and counting, but what is it and why is it getting so much attention?
We look at the issues faced by the eldest sibling in the family, then talk more specifically about why daughters can feel resentful of the role that's foisted on them. It's easily done by us parents, particularly if we live in a patriarchal society.
The expectation that they will do more of the emotional and domestic heavy-lifting in the family than the other siblings can teach them great life-skills, even make them successful in the workplace, but it can also make them resentful at missing out on the benefits of childhood.
In this episode we talk about how we spot it and what can we do to rebalance what might be happening in our family.
THE EXCELLENT BOOK I MENTIONED:
- The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough
USEFUL ARTICLES FROM HOME GIRLS UNITE ON INSTAGRAM:
- https://www.npr.org/2010/11/18/131424878/how-much-does-birth-order-shape-our-lives
- https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2023/11/first-born-children-eldest-daughter-family-dynamics/675986/
- https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/eldest-daughter-syndrome-oldest-sibling-family-responsibilities
BOOK RECOMMENDATIONS FROM SAGE THERAPY CHICAGO:
- The Birth Order Book: Why You Are the Way You Are by Dr. Kevin Leman
- The Eldest Daughter Effect: How Our Family Order Influences Our Lives by
Lisette Schuitemaker - The Sibling Effect: What the Bonds Among Brothers and Sisters Reveal About Us by Jeffrey Kluger
- Sisters First: Stories from Our Wild and Wonderful Life by Jenna Bush Hager and Barbara Pierce Bush
- You Were Always Mom's Favorite!: Sisters in Conversation Throughout Their Lives by Deborah
OtoZen — a new driving safety app
Are you worried about your teenager getting distracted behind the wheel?
The OtoZen app helps in real time — not just after something’s gone wrong. It has voice alerts, drive scores, and even safe driving challenges you can set together, it’s the kind of tech that actually helps your teen build better habits.
OtoZen — a new driving safety app
OtoZen helps build better habits in real time with voice alerts, drive scores, and safey challenges.
This episode is sponsored by OtoZen: The brilliant new driving safety app
https://www.otozen.com
Please hit the follow button if you like the podcast, and share it with anyone who might benefit. You can review us on Apple podcasts by going to the show page, scrolling down to the bottom where you can click on a star then you can leave your message.
I don't have medical training so please seek the advice of a specialist if you're not coping.
My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
And my website has a blog, searchable episodes, and ways to contact me:
www.teenagersuntangled.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/teenagersuntangled/
Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/teenagersuntangled/
You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk