Amanda Montei's fascination with understanding motherhood started long before she became a parent herself. However, it wasn't until she embarked on her PhD journey while welcoming her first child that she began to approach motherhood through a scholarly lens. In her illuminating book, "Touched Out: Motherhood, Misogyny, Consent, and Control," Amanda dissects the nuanced layers of societal expectations and judgments that surround women's bodies, particularly during motherhood, reminding us to be attentive to the stories that are being told to us.Join us for a deep and fascinating episode as Erin and Amanda delve into the complexities of motherhood, dissecting societal norms, reclaiming bodily autonomy, and advocating for systemic reform. This conversation will encourage you to question the “expert” advice around motherhood spouted on social media, and instead to lean into your support systems, embrace your individuality, and set boundaries. Here’s what’s on the table:How societal pressures encroach upon women's bodily autonomy in motherhood and beyond–and why we have to continuing questioning these expectationsExploring the oppressive nature of advice-driven parenting culture online and its isolating impact on mothersHow the lack of systemic support, including paid leave, affordable childcare, and gender equity in parenting responsibilities, exacerbates the challenges faced by mothers.Embracing advice from community support systems, rather than parenting experts and social media gurusHow embracing your individuality and setting boundaries in motherhood, not only empowers mothers, but also models these essential behaviors for childrenOUR GUEST: Amanda Montei is the author of TOUCHED OUT: Motherhood, Misogyny, Consent, & Control (Beacon Press), as well as the memoir Two Memoirs (Jaded Ibis Press) and The Failure Age (Bloof Books). Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Guardian, ELLE, and other publications. She has taught writing at Stanford University, Columbia University, and other institutions, and has received support from In Cahoots and Riverrun Foundation. Amanda holds an MFA in Writing from California Institute of the Arts and a PhD in English literature from SUNY at Buffalo. She resides in California and runs the newsletter Mad Woman.Want more Amanda? Find her online at https://www.amandamontei.com/ and subscribe to her Substack https://amandamontei.substack.com/. Read Amanda’s writing:Book: “Touched Out”"Mothers Want to Be Left Alone"“When I became a mother, I lost my body – and realized it never belonged to me”“I Wanted to Teach My Daughter Bodily Autonomy. Motherhood Taught Me to Value My Own.”Follow Amanda on social media:Instagram: @amonteiTwitter/X: @amandamonteiWant more Hotter Than Ever? Find us and episode transcripts online at www.hotterthaneverpod.com and sign up for our mailing list! Follow us on:Instagram: @hotterthaneverpod TikTok: @hotterthaneverpod Youtube: @hotterthaneverpod Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090728330453 Follow Hotter Than Ever wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss an episode! We’d love to hear what you think about the show - tell us what stories are resonating with you by writing us a review on Apple Podcasts. Want advice about some aspect of your life over 40? DM us on IG @hotterthaneverpod or text/leave a voicemail on the Hotter Than Ever Hottie Hotline at (323) 844-2303 and your question could end up on the show!Mentioned in this episode:Broad CollectiveLearn more about Broad Collective and our membership network for midlife women entrepreneurs at broadcollective.com. Apply to join Broad Collective at https://broad-collective-co.mn.co/landing