You have your hand on the switch. You are the allower or the resister and your emotions tell you which you’re doing right now. It’s easy once you understand the formula. When you feel good, you’re allowing good. When you don’t feel good, you are not allowing good.

We didn’t say, when you feel good you are allowing good, and when you feel bad you are allowing bad (although it may translate into your experience in that way). There is only a Source of Well-being—which you are allowing or not." Esther Hicks/Abraham
The question is how can I allow the good? Appreciation fist thing in the morning can seriously help. Do you have a hand on your switch? Let's chat about pivoting, how to do that, which helps to find the good.
It's always our decision, but not our fault. We are all governed by our robotic reactions, mindfulness can help us to move beyond these. We can move beyond our past. Let's explore who has the hand on your switch?